TW: Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault

It’s time we all start talking about domestic violence and the role it plays in our society. I released a new episode of Another Glass of Sharlie Faye this morning.

I chat with a good friend, Aneleyse about her experiences with domestic violence and sexual assault and she invited me to share my own. I didn’t realize how difficult it would be to start talking about domestic violence, and how it has affected my life.

I’ve kept this part of my life hidden for a long time from my social media platform and from people in my life. The reasons for this have always come back to fear. I’ve shared small bits of it without sharing the whole story and when Aneleyse asked me to share my own experience, I froze.

The people close to me are aware of what I’ve been through. Up until recently, I’ve never publicly shared what happened, what I went through, and how it’s affected the last 5 years of my life. I never felt ready enough.

When I first started podcasting, I planned on creating an episode where I shared my story. Every time I sat down to record this episode, I just couldn’t get the words out. I never finished it and if I would have waited until I felt 100% ready, I’ll be honest with you, I probably would still be waiting.

Thankfully, I have Aneleyse in my life. Knowing you are not alone, makes all the difference when you are healing from domestic violence. While I listened to my friend tell her story, she explained to me why she kept this part of her life a secret for so long. I realized that we shared the same fears just like millions of other women who have gone through similar experiences.

Will they believe me?
Will they think I’m seeking attention?
Will I be heard?

The answer is simple; I don’t know. I can’t control how other people perceive my story, just as I couldn’t control the behaviour of the person who abused me. These things are outside of my control, but the way I move forward to heal from this experience is something I decide. I have chosen to share in hopes that other women feel less alone.

When and if you listen to this episode, I hope the bigger picture shows itself. Aneleyse and I are both survivors of domestic violence, and we are two among many. 1 in 3 women will experience domestic violence once in their lives, a statistic that shouldn’t have to exist in the first place.

1 in 3 women.

I refuse to continue to stay silent.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, there are professionals who can help. Crossroads for Women is a non-profit in Moncton, and is the only domestic violence and sexual assault shelter in South-Eastern New Brunswick.